In Love, May You Find The Next
by itsohsoLovatic
Summary: -may we meet again. Takes place right after Lexa's death in 3x07. Clarke has a nightmare and is quick to be comforted. Angst/friendship/slight romance since Clarke and Lexa slept together. LEXA IS NOT PRESENT, she is only mentioned in this fic.
Clarke sat up quickly from the bed, tears in her eyes. It was just a nightmare. Lexa's scent was still surrounding her. Clarke, Octavia, and Murphy had all stayed in Polis that night, disregarding the blockade being set up around Arkadia. Clarke, with no argument from Titus, stayed in Lexa's bed for last time. Suddenly the door bursts open, and Octavia and Murphy burst through.

Octavia was wearing a simple tank top and shorts, revealing her tattoo, and Murphy wore the same, but his shorts were longer, Titus must've supplied them. "Are you okay? We heard you scream." Octavia says, approaching the bed. Clarke just silently nods, but Murphy crosses the room and sits on the bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her. "Lexa just _died_." Murphy says slowly through clenched teeth. "Do you really think she's okay?" He asks and Clarke sobs into his chest.

"I may be an asshole, but I do have a heart." He says and Octavia approaches the two of them. They know that Lexa loved Clarke. They know that Clarke loves Lexa. But they don't know the guilt and regret that Clarke has to live with now.

She's guilty because that bullet, that bullet that was meant for her, killed the love of her life. If Lexa had just stayed in the room and not come looking for her, she would still be alive. The regret of not telling Lexa that she loved her when she had the chance. The regret of waiting so long to tell Lexa she was ready, only for her to be shot less than an hour later.

 _It should've been me_ , Clarke thinks. "That bullet was for me." Clarke mumbles. "It should've been me."

"It shouldn't have been either of you." Octavia says quickly. "Neither of you should've been in harm's way." She says. "No one should have." She says. "But she did." Clarke sobs. It's silent for a few moments before she speaks again. "I never got to tell her that I love her."

Octavia's own eyes tear up and she taps Murphy's arm, silently telling him to go back to sleep. Murphy gets up and walks back to his room down the hall, leaving the two women in the room alone. "It's gonna be okay, Clarke." Octavia whispers into blonde hair. "It'll be okay." She whispers. "When?" Clarke sobs. Octavia opens her mouth to speak and closes it again, gathering her thoughts.

"Eventually." She says softly. "It won't be anytime soon, and it won't be easy." She whispers. "But eventually, it will hurt a little less. It'll be bearable." Octavia whispers. Clarke's sobs quiet after a few minutes and she's almost asleep again when there's a knock on the door. Except it's not Titus.

It's Aden.

The boy stands straight in his uniform and Octavia notices the shoulder guard and red cloak flowing behind him. Clarke looks up and chokes back another sob. "Clarke." He says softly. "May I come in?" He asks. "Yes, it is your room now, Heda." Clarke says softly, she makes a move to leave the room, but Aden is quick to step forward and stop her. "No, stay." He says. "I am in no rush to move in." He says softly. Clarke moves back onto the bed again.

"I actually came to give you my condolences." He says, softening his gaze. "Lexa was a great commander and mentor." He says. Clarke nods, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "She was an even better friend." He says. "She spoke very highly of you, Clarke." He says. "She really loved you." He whispers and Clarke looks up. "She wanted you to live here in Polis with her." He tells her. They're silent for a few moments before he speaks up again. "I also came to give you this." He says, reaching behind him to pull something from his belt.

"She would've wanted you to have this." He says, pulling Lexa's dagger from where it was tucked into his belt at the small of his back, and presenting it to her. "It is my duty to pass it on." He says, holding it out towards Clarke. Octavia looks at the boy as Clarke reaches forward, he had yet to put the small metal gear Lexa always wore between his brows yet. He couldn't have been older than fifteen at most. "Thank you, Heda." Clarke chokes out. She will forever associate the title with Lexa. "You can call me Aden," He says. "If it makes it any easier." He whispers. "She also told me that you were to get her horse." He says. The two women look up. "A buckskin stallion, _Sonraun_." He says.

"Also, I want you to know that I will carry out Lexa's final wishes." He says, making Clarke and Octavia look up. "I will keep you safe. Your people will not be harmed unless absolutely necessary." He says. "You will be safe here in Polis, but you are free to come and go as you please." Aden says. "Also, take what you'd like from Lexa's possessions. She'd have wanted that." He says.

"I'll leave you to sleep now." He says, turning around to leave. "Thank you, Heda Aden." Clarke says as he makes it to the door. He smiles slightly. "You're welcome." He says softly and makes his way out of the room, the door closing softly behind him. Octavia doesn't say anything to Clarke, she doesn't have to. Because Clarke knows. She knows that Octavia won't say anything because she doesn't have to. She knows Octavia will be there for her. "I don't want to forget her." Clarke whispers. "So don't." Octavia whispers. "You don't have to forget her." Octavia whispers.

"Try to get some sleep now, it's been a rough day." She whispers. "I'll help you collect some things of hers tomorrow." Octavia says softly. "Will you stay?" Clarke asks softly. "Always." Octavia says. "I wasn't planning on going back to my room now anyways." She smiles, a small chuckle erupting from her throat. Clarke smiles softly. "Thank you, Octavia." She whispers after a few minutes. "No problem."

* * *

 **I'm still mad jrat killed her off, and like that, He could've at least given her a damn hero's death like she deserved. Well, Long Live Heda Leksa.**


End file.
